(That’s a picture of me battling the BULLSH&%$#@!!! )
I remember a time not very long ago when I was DEEPPRREESSEEEEDDD. I mean BAD… Not fun to be around at all. When I saw people that were happy I thought they were faking it. I couldn’t even understand what happy meant… In fact people that were happy kinda pissed me off :)
If you read this blog or if you know me personally… YOU know that I’ve made drastic changes in my life. Being depressed is fine when you’re in it… In fact you almost want to hold onto it because its kinda easy to be down on everything – Common statements “Why does the bad Sh*&$! always happen to me, it’s so much easier for her or him, It’s too hard, I can’t, If only I had ‘money, a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a hot body’ then it would all be ok…” But would it?
I got tired of playing the victim and hearing the same broken record over and over again. Frankly I got tired of hearing my own bullsh&%@$… Figuring out that it was me and only me that could pull myself out of the darkness was my turning point. It’s easy to get down on life. Life can get realllyyy hard, I’m not denying that. BUT it’s not about how hard life is, it’s about how we handle it. Pointing fingers and gossiping about BS does not serve anyone. In fact, it keeps us in a mindset that people are out to get us, that life’s hard, that life’s impossible… BLLAAHHH. That’s not a way to think because it leaves us feeling hopeless.
We need to shift our focus, We need to find a way to believe that anything’s possible. Sometimes it takes major adversity to be able to recognize just how blessed we are as human beings. To realize that we are survivors… Overcoming adversity is a HUGE confidence builder… Finding light after being in the darkness will change you forever.
Jessica had a couple of near death experiences due to drug abuse. Overcoming that is what made her the survivor she is today. Dealing with that on a day-to-day basis allows her to believe she can overcome and do anything. I was suspended from a basketball team for breaking the team code annnddd was cheated on by my first love in the same year. After several years of zombie like behavior I snapped out of it and realized my “job” and my “girlfriend” did not define me… I define me and I choose how my story ends.
“Can’t nobody take my pride can’t nobody hold me down… OH NO, I’ve got to keep on moving!” – Mase
Those two major events forced me to stop being such an ass and start taking responsibility for my life and myself.
Here’s what I believe. As human beings we take BIG EXAMS a lot. The EXAM of life. And in order to get into the next “grade” we have to pass the test. BUT some people refuse to study, they keep writing the wrong answers ssooo they get held back. They refuse to recognize their weaknesses and will not make the effort to change them. Sooooo 3rd grade FOREVER!!!
Crap I’ve been that person. The person that says the same BULLSH&*$#… AND it kept happening to me over and over again. It kept happening because I didn’t pass The BULLSH&%$# Test that will take me to the next level of evolution… 3rd GRADE FOREVER
Until we can recognize that the BS has everything to do with us and nothing to do with other people we will continue the negative pattern.
- I hate my boss… Every boss they have ever had they hated – Hard truth, it’s not the boss.
- My boyfriend is an asshole… Stop picking assholes, maybe try going out with a nice guy
- I don’t understand why I’m surrounded by drama all the time – That’s the same person that says.. “Ooops I accidentally made out with my best friends boyfriend.”
Being caught in a bad pattern can last a lifetime… It’s my goal in life to reach my full potential, to be the BEST version of myself. To continue to evolve, find bad patterns and BREAK Them. An “issue” is an issue only if we make it one.
For me it’s fun to think of life as an EXAM. Certain grades do seem to last longer than others… but if we really want it enough anyone can graduate with honors, anyone. All we have to do is keep moving forward and being the best we can be personally and professionally every single day.